Jeans * Joe's Guide to Perfect Eye Contact

Fuente

I found the link to this guide on this subreddit and I think it has some really useful info. So here y'all go. I know some of y'all may've been looking for this as well and have not found it yet.

I've talked with jeans * Joe before, if I can cross-post his guide and have already done that in another forum. He told me, however, that I should please post the guide only under his specific title, so I was so free and have your thread renamed so that it corresponds to the title. Here is the guide:

Nota de traducción

El post original está traducido del alemán al inglés, así que la gramática es un poco irregular en algunas partes.

Foreword

One of my first posts I read about PickUp was David Shade's Eye Contact Experiment. I read the post twice and then started to look each one in the eye and to understand the game that we humans play with our eyes. Today I know that I will probably never quite understand. But that must be what I already know is incredibly effective on the pickup. It's so effective it's been one of my main game elements for a long time and it's very calibrated.

I notice again and again how unimportant the objective communication is and that much more information in the subcommunication, so the body language, voice, etc. are transmitted. Communication is only to a tiny percentage the sum and meaning of our words.

Again, there are 2 parts, the beginner's edition, which everyone has to go through to get their EC on Fordermann and the Mastery Edition for those who have the Beginners behind. I would not advise anyone to do it the other way around or omit the Beginners Edition - this can lead to incorrect calibration and damage your game.

Beginners Edition

The rules

The Beginners Edition for sets that have not been (yet) approved:

Look her in the eye when she appears 10 yards (or less) in front of you. Not before - otherwise you are looking too long and that is AFC.
Look at what you like. You do not have to apologize for looking at someone. Everyone has the right to look at you. You do not have to be ashamed. It is perfectly natural to look at people.
Look in one eye. Exactly one. The best way to find an eye that you use for all women, then you never get confused. In principle it does not matter which eye is important, away from the ass and the tits.
If you do it right in the beginning you can look at it and touch it long enough later. Besides, you do not seem nervous if you only look at one point. If you constantly switch between the eyes or if your look is very restless, she becomes nervous and will leave. We want her to feel safe and calm with you.
Stay on it. You do not look away. She looks away first! You stay with your first choice. It does not change before she looks away. No matter how ugly or pretty she is. You stay on it until she looks away. Only then do you have the right to look away again.
If she walks past you then do not look behind her. Either you approach them when she's a meter in front of you with a simple "hi" or an opener of your choice or you let her pass. This also means that you do not turn your head more than 20°! You are the price! You were only slightly interested, nothing more. You are not a sexual predator who looks after everyone and just wants to bark.
If she looks away and she is pretty then stay tuned. She will normally look at you again. The second look is the last. Look at her a second time and she looks away, you just have the approach or you'll lose her. Often the second look takes a long time and is very personal. Do not be put off and keep watching.
She does everything first. She smiles first - then you smile. She turns her body first - only then you turn your head by a maximum of 20°. And maybe, if you're really really interested, you can also turn your upper body. But if she spends no energy and does not do the movement first then you do not do anything. She has to earn it already.
Chest out, let your shoulders hang back. Do not stare but are interested but do not look too interested, do not say needy. You find it interesting but nothing more. You only look at her because she likes you, not because you want her attention.
DO NOT LOOK DAMN. DO NOT MOVE YOUR EYES FROM YOUR WAY. If you look away then you have lost. That's a DLV (Demonstration of Lower Value). When you first look away, you must never look again because you would always lose. In that case you have to save your dignity and not look anymore. Never again. No matter how damn cute she is.
It is very important that you stick to every single rule! There are no exceptions. These rules always apply.
After some time you will want to deviate from the rules. In this case, it's like pirates too: rules are more of a guideline. These rules are not incontestable, but I still state how important they are today. In 97% of all cases, they vote or make a good first impression.

Small additional tip

It may be that you shake your eyes. Try to get a straight dominant view on it. If you meet me in the RL then ask me if necessary if your look is right, I will help you to improve something if necessary - do not be shy, just ask, I like to do it. And now start doing all sorts of things in front of the mirror while still looking into the eye. The eye does not move, only the head.

Why the whole

Imagine an AFC. He is shy and withdrawn. And then there's a HB9. He looks her in the neckline or maybe he has a good day and he even looks her in the eye. The HB9 sees this and looks at the AFC. He looks away quickly and pretends to look elsewhere and is ashamed.

What does all this look like from the point of view of a woman?

You had a good day, just bought some boots and are looking forward to the Jonny Depp video evening with your girlfriends. Suddenly you notice that the guy next to you is not just passing by but looking at you. You look at him and he looks away immediately. Was that cute? No, rather not. Rather, he is ashamed that he is even where he is. At that moment, he would rather not exist, cast no shadow, and breathe no air. So you will treat him that way too.

So it will be nothing.

When I look a woman in the eye, no matter what age, the same process usually happens: Depending on how busy she was, I can bind her to me. Some look subconscious at first and then get on with what they are doing. At best, she'll hold her eyes for a while, get a big grin and then look down. At that moment you feel like a god. The look down with a smile is one of the best IOIs ever. If that happens you will be on the M3 model in A2 or in very rare cases C1. So you save a whole lot of pointless blabber and start there as it's fun.

What will happen

In the beginning, you will not be able to hold your gaze for long, depending on how high your self-esteem is. You will feel an inner pressure to look away. Almost reflexively this will happen to you a few times. The higher the HB Note, the harder it is to catch the eye.

Do not let that put you off and keep your eyes on it until it looks away. Force yourself! That's why I've written rules above, not guidelines. If you do not keep yourself meticulous for a while, you run the risk of making too many exceptions and the exception becomes the rule.

It's a game... with the leaderboard

See it as a game. Imagine you are in second grade and you play with her who looks away first. This rule still exists all over. There is a ranking in this world. And everyone has a place. No place is double occupied. If you meet a person then you have a picture of it and you are placing yourself above or below.

Have you ever been in a set, you said something that you knew was going to fly out right now - at that moment, you've diminished your rank. Have you ever been in a set and brought a neg or something, and suddenly changed the mood of your set? At that moment, you jumped up.

If you look away you lose the game. You place yourself under. No matter if man or woman. Often one is surprised how fast the others look away. For men, I rather recommend the "what's up?" look than the "I'm slightly interested" look.

Punish yourself when you first look away. Do not look again. You have lost and no chance to bring it back. Sometimes this is still possible later on, but at the beginning you have no chance. You have to start conditioning yourself to keep looking. If you manage to look away first then feel like a king. You won. She knows it too!

Do it everywhere and at any time! I do it 24/7. I never have a break and I have great success with it - later. The more often you make this game the faster you will calibrate it.

What if…?

I look away first? Failure. Do not look again. It leads to nothing. There is no 2nd chance!
She looks away first and up? Unattracted. Normally, you can look for a new pair of eyes. There is nothing to get here. She knows that she is above you and does not mind such a game.
She looks away first and to the side? Continue watching. The site is neutral. At first she will look at 30% again, 90% later. If she looks again you can reward her with a smile. Not a needy smile but a "Caught" smile or a wink.
Looking away first and down? Great! You just got Attraction. We are in phase A1. It has subverted itself and now you just have to deal responsibly with it. You can see further but be assured that she will only watch 2 times in total. If you do not approach them then you lose every second to Attraction.

No matter where she looks, her facial expressions and posture are very important. When she opens her body (taking apart her arms/legs, exposing her neck or showing her wrists, her upper body turns to you), that's an IOI to add to the line of sight. If she smiles, that's an IOI too. If she stops doing what she's doing, that's an IOI, too.

A few more thoughts

A long look is an IOI, as well as a smile. Stick to it and DO NOT LOOK AWAY! If she does not want to look away then there are 2 solutions: Mystery Style (tongue out and big eyes, she will laugh and look away), or the middle finger — BUT ONLY if she is HB9 or HB10. Everything under it you have to weaken with a mischievous grin.
Pay attention to your body language and your thoughts. She can tell if you are needy or an alpha.
Some will see that you are looking straight ahead. They pretend that they do not want to look. These are the girls who get stuck in your eye in the near future. Some of them still squint. Then help a mischievous "Caught!" grin.
In very busy pedestrian precincts you hardly have a chance. Try it anyway. Run slower than the others, then it works even better.
The success of the EC is very much dependent on how its state is at the beginning. The longer you calibrate the EC, the more you can drag it into your frame. If she's in a good mood and just laughs with a friend and looks at you then do not think right now she's laughing because you look at her.
You can also do the EC with guys. Make sure you do not look aggressive or you will provoke a fight.

Possible openers

"Hi" — "thanks" — hb: "for what?"
"Sometimes you just have a bad day and then someone comes and just smiles at you kindly and from then on you realize that the day can only get better and you should give the day a chance. You just saved my day. Thank you."

Mastery Edition

When can I start with Mastery Edition?

You have read, understood and practiced the Beginners Edition over a period of 4 weeks (at least!). You can look HB9 in the eye and keep your eye contact until it looks away. Where she looks does not matter. If you have answered any of them with No then start with the Beginners Edition first.

Welcome to the Sacred Halls of Wordless Attraction and Comfort Generation. Yes right - you can also generate comfort only by EC.

Why eye contact? number 2

Eye contact, whether inside or outside the set, determines that you are attentive. If you have something threatening or haunting (in a negative sense) in your eyes then use this only for men and not for women! For women it might be useful to look at something mysterious.

Eye contact thus ensures with your counterpart that they have attention and you are really interested in her stuff, and do you get close to this person. It can happen very fast that you can lead your game very fast from A1 to C2 or S1 - without much to talk about!

In general, try to look friendly and interested in each other's eyes as long as possible. And before it becomes uncomfortable for your counterpart and he looks away more often, you look every now and then - but less than your counterpart.

Awareness radius and trance

I hope you know the Awareness Radius principle. Otherwise, I would recommend that you first read through it a bit and practice this technique a bit. The whole thing overlaps easily with a kind of trance.

When you see the woman and you look straight into an eye then try to fade everything out except her eye and face. Focus only on her and the vibe between you.

Basically, there are two extremes of this look: one is "Hey who are you, I find you interesting" — pretty playful and curious, sometimes with sexual tension. The other is "I feel like I've known you for an eternity and we can tell each other." In most cases, it's a mixture of the two.

Awareness radius: When you look at her you just look her in the eye and recognize her face. You do not care about the rest of the room. Try to build a vacuum, like a bubble around you both, in which only you both know what's going on.

Trance: If you have something to do with NLP then this will help you. I'm talking about a very light trance in which she follows your emotions and gets them too. First of all, she has to look at you. From that moment on, you can lead them into trance through eye contact. It is important that you make only slow movements from now on, the eyes are not turned away, the head as possible not move, maybe a slow nod to show their appreciation. A grin to make her smile or whatever you're up to.

The SOI

This look is essentially an SOI (Statement of Intent). YOU show that you find them interesting - whether sexual or just for communication. You can not be ashamed of it in any case. It's best to see it as a unique compliment to this woman. A compliment you give away WITHOUT cross-talk. If you do not expect an outcome, that's a good DHV.

Body language and facial expressions

If you are running, there is a very effective technique to show some DHV and get more Attraction, related to the Awareness Radius. In a pedestrian zone, for example: You run through the crowd, your AR is relatively small so you dodge all. Then you see her and look her straight in the eye. You do not change your speed and continue to run as you did before. She will look at you. You keep looking at it even if you are walking in a completely different direction. If she does not look away, you may turn your head as you walk past her. It is important that you do not change the speed or direction of your movement.

If you are not running then just continue the movement you are doing. When drinking from a glass, many girls see away; drinking with a straw brings with it a slightly sexual allusion that is not to be despised.

Your facial expressions should not change at first. Continue what you do. If you tell your friends something then go ahead and look at it. As long as you talk, she will not look away.

If you have the opportunity to change your posture before looking at it then try to adopt a posture that suits the mood you want to bring it into. In most cases, I use a quiet mood, relaxed posture without looking listless, a slight pleasant grin, head leaning slightly to the side, tending forward a bit to look through under the eyebrows. The arms laid loose, not crossed.

What will happen

In most cases she will still look twice. You have to be aware that this eye contact is a direct opener. You do not have to justify why you want to get to know them but you just say that you want it. A normal direct is:

"Hey you are pretty, I want to meet you."

"Hey you like me, I want to meet you."

"I like your charisma, I want to get to know you."

In this view, the reason is omitted. She fills it out herself.

What does that mean for you? You can not go anymore and do an indirect. You still have situational and direct. If her friends are wrong and they have not noticed much that between you and the target this unique attraction is created then it is very useful to hold that tension - to have a little secret that the others do not know. If you take a situational opener, it will be indirect to your friends, your target knows exactly what is going on, and it will be direct for them.

Whether she looks down, up or to the side, you almost can not care anymore. You should be far enough that you can recognize her attraction no matter where she sees you.

The better you get the more women will look down. I would only respond to those who send you an IOI. After all, she must earn the Approach if you make her a direct opener. Those who look down and submit to it without grinning are AFC women who can not do anything with your opener.

DHV

A direct opener is DHV. He lives from having the eggs to go to her and tell her that you are on her. Without outcome dependence! A very funny direct opener is for example: "Hey you are pretty! ... go on." The joke is that you reach the hook point with the first part of the opener.

The secret of direct, as always, is not the words but the way you say it.

The important thing is that you are not outcome dependent. Your presence and personality must occur in such a way that you distribute a compliment because you just feel like doing so. If you have mastered the previous point, the second most important thing is that you have to be able to deal with any kind of resonance. What you can not do under any circumstances is be surprised by what comes. The best way to show her the reaction that comes from her is exactly what you provoked. So if she looks annoyed then you laugh because you wanted that.

By self-sufficient I mean that even if the whole room is full of friends, the moment you look at them you are alone. All alone. You know that and you enjoy it.

Isolation is the secret of a direct - always isolation. By placing only one woman from the set direct, you isolate her from the others.

More mindsets

No matter how pretty she is, she is a human and therefore nothing special. Still, you've discovered something unique about her that you give her a compliment - your look. You are an open person with whom everyone easily gets into conversation.

Bedroom view

A small secret weapon for situations in which you want to bring them to a sexual vibe. The good old bedroom view - like you're about to have sex. Relax, build up a relaxed atmosphere for a short time, let some banter and playfulness flow into it. If you notice that she is moving in this emotion then bring some sexual tension in your eyes. She will start to mirror you and follow you into this state.

Conversation

The better your view, the less important the conversation becomes. Our communication is not the sum of our words in a conversation that makes sense — the sum of our words is insignificant at first.

The text is the social excuse for the PUA to get closer to HB. The HB needs this for her friends. Some HBs need such an excuse to even talk to you without a "BitchShield."

The two extreme forms are:

The text is unimportant, there is only the vibe between you and your lips are moving.
The text is the most important because you want to exchange information.

It is not good to do one of the two extremes all the time. We need a mix of both: apply (1) whenever they have done something well, to reward them; apply (2) whenever you need new information to maintain the conversation.

What is this information? In principle, everything that creates comfort — her name, where she comes from, what she does for work, whether she has siblings, etc. Deepen the conversation, so that the vibe will deepen.

Time window

There is the theory of time windows. You talk to HB and it works, it's time to kiss-close. You notice that in the vibe between you. Now a clock is ticking - it's a "vibe watch." For some time, the vibe will stay that way for you to do a kiss-close. At some point the window closes, sometimes forever, and it will be hard to reopen.

Therefore use these time windows as they occur.

Anchors with looks

An anchor is placed whenever something happens repeatedly to a unique situation. In this case, the unique situation is your gaze, which should now differ in intensity and mood from those of other people. What we repeat is the emotion we want to anchor - for example Attraction and Comfort, or even Seduction feelings.

Whenever she has a positive feeling and you realize that you look her in the eye, if you do not look away, she will anchor that and after some time she will get positive feelings if you just look at her.

Nota del autor original

The one I found from this sub is German - English translation, so it has some iffy grammar and stuff, so you might have to use some inference skills.